HANDLES
According to my mentor, a handle is some aspect of our triggered reaction
that we can grab onto and use to open the door to the past trauma.
Once we find a handle, we can plug it into a neutralizing technique,
and the technique will lead us to the anchor (past trauma)
and to neutralizing the emotional charge attached to the anchor.
Often, a technique will tell us what to use as the handle.
But if it doesn't, below are some ways to find a handle:
Belief
What do I believe about myself, others, or life In this triggering situation or because of it?
Story
What is the story that I am telling myself about this triggering situation?
Thought
What is my overriding thought?
Problem
In this triggering situation, what is the problem?
Or you can go a little deeper, ask, What is the fear beneath this problem?
Emotion
What am I feeling? (Might help to look at a list of feelings)
What is my strongest feeling about this situation?
Self-Centered Survival Fear
What is my self-centered survival fear in this situation?
Survival Reaction
What is my survival reaction in this situation?
(examples: wanting to confront someone, wanting to run away,
freezing up, being silent, suppressing my feelings, people-pleasing)
Sensation
What am I feeling in my body? Where is the sensation?
Simple Statement
Simply state what happened without evaluation